I Do Not Believe That ALL Dishonoring Is A Sin.

This post has been removed for now.  I posted it while angry.  If in a few days i still feel the same way I will repost it.

Until then, Please pray for me if you have the time.  I am having a very hard time right now.  My PTSD is very active and so is my depression.  The lesson for Wed. Bible study did not set well with me and has pulled open old painful scars from my early days in the church growing up a PK.  The scars run very deep and it took me over 32 years to come back and give the church a second chance.  Right now I feel as if I made a mistake by returning because much of the attitudes and self-justification from the 60’s and early 70’s are still alive and well today.

Thanks, Guy

I will never Be Normal

I will never Be Normal

It has become painfully clear that I live in a world that normal people do not understand and can not relate my world to them.  I live in a world that if left untreated becomes a danger to society like the man on the beach with the evil spirit who lived in caves told about in the Bible.

When my medications work, I am relatively sane and safe to be in the world.  When they do not work who knows what will happen.  During this passed week, I have tried to explain what is going on with me as best I know how.  The message did not make it to the destination.  It fell far short of the intended goal. 

I do not like to hurt people in any way, shape or form.  My past is full of pain and sorrow.  Some I caused and some I did not cause; but way too much for any life time.

Every five years of my life, as far back as I can remember, I go through a “major” manic/depressive episode.  Why I do not know.  I just know it happens no matter how much I prepare against it or to control it.  2009 to 2010 is the five year mark of these episodes and my medication does not seem to be controlling the effects very well.

What I am going through right now.

Mixed Manic/Depressive Episode

Bipolar Disorder may experience an elevated (extremely happy/depressed) mood, often described as a ‘mixed” feeling.  This mixed feeling is a combination of symptoms from the manic and depressed sides of the disorder being experienced at the same time.   These feelings are often frightening for the individual experiencing them and for others who witness them.  People who live with these episodes also experience consequences that result in conditions that must be dealt with after the symptoms fade.

A mixed episode which I seem to be experiencing at this time includes elevated racing thoughts which cause lack of sleep that lead to frustrated moods and quick irritable reactions that last at for extended periods of time; (Weeks to months) following the onset of the first symptoms.

Some of my identified symptoms are as follows;

                     Excessive spending on home repairs and remodel I could not afford

                     Tormented sleep

                     Restless sleep

                     Extreme nightmares

                     Not sleeping

                     Easily distracted

                     Racing thoughts

       Feeling restless at times

       Loss of motivation or being sluggish

       Fatigue and loss of energy

       Strong feelings of worthlessness and failure

       Excessive feelings of being misunderstood

       Strong guilt for letting other’s down

       Hard to really think and concentrate

       Fear of making a mistake causing indecisiveness

       Recurring thoughts of isolation

       Recurring thoughts of giving up

       Strong feelings of loneliness

 Guy Lewis; July 16, 2009

Why We Gather at the Table: A Lord’s Supper Devotion

At least on two different occasions we are told in scripture to obey and be subject to our rulers and authorities.  The implication of the command to obey those of authority over us:  our government, the police officer, bosses, parents, Elders is to obey their directions.  The scriptures do not give us a choice in this matter.  We are simply told to obey.

Our responsibility in obedience is not based upon how many or how few of man made rules and laws there are by the people in authority over us.  Our responsibility to God is to always obey.

Because you and I became a Christian, we agreed to follow the standard the Lord established in our lives and to stop following the standard upon which we once lived our lives.

The apostle Paul lived by quite a different set of rules before he met Jesus and he wrote about this in his letter to Titus.

Tit 3:3-7 “At one time we too were foolish, disobedient, deceived and enslaved by all kinds of passions and pleasures. We lived in malice and envy, being hated and hating one another.  But when the kindness and love of God our Savior appeared, he saved us, not because of righteous things we had done, but because of his mercy. He saved us through the washing of rebirth and renewal by the Holy Spirit, whom he poured out on us generously through Jesus Christ our Savior, so that, having been justified by his grace, we might become heirs having the hope of eternal life.”

When we entered into God’s grace within our lives and more so when we enter the assembly to gather around the Lord’s Table:  To what authority do you submit?

Certainly we come around the Communion Table to remember Jesus in our lives, but there is much more to it then that. 

We come to this table to submit to the authority of Jesus Christ in our lives.

“And He took bread, gave thanks and broke it, and gave it to them, saying, “This is My body which is given for you; do this in remembrance of Me.“

It is also stated this way; “In the same manner He also took the cup after supper, saying, “This cup is the new covenant in My blood. This do, as often as you drink it, in remembrance of Me.“

This is a command.  These words of Jesus, read in Luke 22:19 and from Paul in 1 Cor. 11:25 are a command we are directed to follow. 

You see it was first Jesus who commanded us to be here.  It was Jesus who commanded us to take of the bread and drink from the cup.  When we concentrate of Jesus at this time and not our worldly lives; we are recognizing that it is only by the Lord’s authority and power that we are saved.  Why?  Because;

Acts 4:12 “Salvation is found in no one else, for there is no other name under heaven given to men by which we must be saved.”

How self-centered and selfish of us to neglect being around the Table our Jesus prepared.  If we can not be here because of our love for Jesus and what He does for us, then at least we can be here out of obedience to Him as Lord of All.

You see it is His love that compels us as Christians, but it is His command that demands our presence.

Let us all in quite meditation, follow the command of Jesus; blocking out of our minds what happen yesterday, what is going to happen for lunch, what songs we have song or will sing, the person sitting near you, and focus on the mercy, the grace, the great love, the needed death, the cross of Jesus and his resurrection over deaths power as we remember that we do this solely for Jesus.

Are We Really Following the 1st Century Pattern?

Some facts to think about concerning the Church Assembly of the First Century.

Dress: (Not fancy attire of suits, ties and high class dresses)

Males = A cloth head cover which extended to the shoulders, a tunic undergarment covered by a loose fitting mantle outer garment with a four inch leather belt or cloth girdle and sandals.

Females = A cloth head cover which extended to the shoulders, a tunic undergarment covered by a loose fitting mantle outer garment and sandals.

Place: (Not carpeted buildings with comfortable padded pews and air conditioning)

Synagogue court yard, Caves, Catacombs, Private homes, River banks, and Schools

Reason: (Not five acts)

Praise God (Psalm 148:5)

Supportive concern for each other (Heb10:24)

Communion (1 Cor. 11;26)

Time: (No set weekly time given or implied by scripture)

Assembly was logically held in the early morning or late evening because most Christians were peasants, slaves, servants or haired workers during the day.

Teachers: (Not just males)

All who had a lesson; Male or female.  (1 Cor 14:26)

Song Leaders: (Not just males)

No God designed or authorized position of worship authority.  All who had a song lead their song; Male or female. (1 Cor. 14:26)

Communion Servers: (Not just males)

God, according to scriptures, has not designed or authorized any all male communion service.  All who attend the assembly took part in the communion be they males or females.