Over the past several months, my friend Jere and I have set in Denny’s and talked about different aspects of 12 Step Recovery Programs. Tonight I would like to talk about two areas concerning sharing ones past, where I feel 12 Step programs works extremely well and we can learn from them in our Christian walk.
This lesson, though it was born from a conversation concerning addictions, can be applied to every area of life. People can have struggles, any kind of bondage, grief, guilt, shame, fears, destructive habits and or hardship in life.
However, it is true that in Payson, much of our out reach work will come in contact with people linked in some way to some form of addiction.
A person is a slave to what ever controls them. 2 Peter 2:19 “They promise them freedom, while they themselves are slaves of depravity– for a man is a slave to whatever has mastered him.” (NIV)
God wants the things of this earth to serve His purpose to us rather then be our masters in life. Let me give you a picture to work with.
Remember God gave Adam authority over all the earth. But when the devil comes into the picture and Adam comes out from under the authority of God, everything gets turned upside down. So instead of Adam having lordship over the earth, the earth starts to have authority over Adam.
You ask, “What do you mean?” I will boil it down for you.
Man was created to rule the barley plant.
Man was created to rule the tobacco plant.
Man was created to rule food.
Man was created to rule gold.
When the devil got involved the divine order got upset. What was meant to be our servant became our master.
It does not matter if it is money, food, sex or fill in the blank __________, those things were created to be excellent servants but they are terrible masters.
Why is it that people experience so much life transformation in a 12 Step recovery program and not in a quote un-quote organized church gathering?
The difference is not that they have discovered something else in addition to Jesus; the difference is they are actually practicing the instructions of Jesus.
If you want the water of the Jordan to part so you can enter the promise land, you have to get your faith wet.
That water did not part until those priests stepped into the water in obedience to the commands of God.
Knowing the commands of God will not transform your life.
You need to be aware of the commands of God.
But transformation begins when you begin to walk out the black and white in living color.
What happens in a recovery group is that people are so desperate to have a different kind of life that they actually start to practice what they have been told so they can live differently and better.
God respects people that live out His promises no matter where they are.
The promises of God are not reserved only for organized Christian gatherings on Sunday. God is not just a respecter of organized Christian gatherings. God respects the promises He makes anytime some body is actually walking out the actions of the promises no matter where they are in faith that they will work. Examples: (Matt. 8:13) (Matt. 15:28) (Mark 7:29) (Acts 10:22)
There are two purposes to “give the reason for the hope that we have.”
The first principle is freedom:
The first is the healing principle of sharing. The healing principle of sharing is one person talking to another from the heart. Our God knows that healing takes place both upwardly towards heaven and outwardly towards each other when we share from the heart: Freedom.
We will start with Paul himself:
Gal 1:12-24 “For I neither received it from man, nor was I taught it, but it came through the revelation of Jesus Christ. For you have heard of my former conduct in Judaism, how I persecuted the church of God beyond measure and tried to destroy it. And I advanced in Judaism beyond many of my contemporaries in my own nation, being more exceedingly zealous for the traditions of my fathers. But when it pleased God, who separated me from my mother’s womb and called me through His grace, to reveal His Son in me, that I might preach Him among the Gentiles, I did not immediately confer with flesh and blood, nor did I go up to Jerusalem to those who were apostles before me; but I went to Arabia, and returned again to Damascus. Then after three years I went up to Jerusalem to see Peter, and remained with him fifteen days. But I saw none of the other apostles except James, the Lord’s brother. (Now concerning the things which I write to you, indeed, before God, I do not lie.) Afterward I went into the regions of Syria and Cilicia. And I was unknown by face to the churches of Judea which were in Christ. But they were hearing only, “He who formerly persecuted us now preaches the faith which he once tried to destroy.” And they glorified God in me.” (NKJV)
Paul tells his story three times in scripture: Once to the church in Galatia and twice to non-believers. (Acts 21:40 to Acts 22:21 to Jews who want him stoned and again from Acts 25:23 to Acts 26:32 to King Agrippa)
When putting this lesson together I asked myself: “Why is it that God had the Apostle Paul tell the story of his past life and conversion three times in scriptures?” Why was this principle important? It shows others that they also can change.
I Peter 3:15 “But in your hearts set apart Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect,” (NIV)
Everyone loves a tale of triumph over adversity, or how someone struggled through some truly awful childhood experiences to become a “normal” or even successful adult. Some write whole books on the subject, others write shorter articles or give interviews, but the interest is constant. Why is this?
God gave us away to share in each others live and I believe that is the main reason of Hebrews 10:24-25 “And let us consider one another in order to stir up love and good works, not forsaking the assembling of ourselves together, as is the manner of some, but exhorting one another, and so much the more as you see the Day approaching.” (NKJV) has three points:
1. The act of sharing your experiences can be liberating to you and to others. Setting it all down on paper or talking about it can be a good way of dealing with emotions that have been left to fester or have been locked away for many years. It can also be a way of working out why things happened the way they did, and if there are any ways on which you can act or respond differently in the future to stop them from happening that way again. This all supposes that your experiences were negative of course and that you don’t want to repeat them.
2. Often people want to share positive experiences as well, to inspire or encourage others in their endeavors, or to share tips on how to succeed. There is a balance to be struck here though between sharing and coming across as a self-help guru; too much positivity can be just as much a put off as too much negativity.
3. There is another reason to speak up about the things you have seen and done, and one that I am particularly interested in. There are people that fear the retribution against them by their loved ones or friends because they do not have the same beliefs and are seeking a different spiritually and understanding of God, or just have plain lack of confidence in their ability to understand God in today’s world or society. In some ways this is where I find myself due to my past.
Most people feel they have no option but to accept being dealt a poor hand. Humans, by nature, go with the flow; we are creatures of habit and few really like to stand out from the crowd. So you see, when we keep our secrets to our selves, we stay sick and stuck and we keep others sick and stuck as well because we do not show them the way out. Furthermore we keep the ones who love us most sick and stuck; not knowing what to do to help.
Jesus lived a perfect life that was sinless and pleasing to God, but no one among us can make that claim. Paul could not do it and neither can we.
God doesn’t waste a “hurt,” and He wants to use our failures and imperfections for good – our weaknesses are, after all, some of the greatest tools in His top drawer. Rom 8:28 “And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose.” (NKJV)
“No matter how far down the scale we have gone, we will see that our experience can benefit others.” (A.A. page 84)
The first principle of faith is to help others who are struggling in areas we have over come in our own lives or direct them to people who have the experience to help them over come.
2Cor 1:3-4 “Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our tribulation, that we may be able to comfort those who are in any trouble, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God.” (NKJV)
The second principle of faith is confession:
It is hard for us to “openly admit our faults to God and another human being we trust” in church because no one hardly does it. But it is a scriptural concept. People are really doing this. Thousands of people are doing this and changing their lives for the better every day.
Un-repented sin creates guilt.
Guilt can be a powerful thing in our lives. Prov 28:13 “He who covers his sins will not prosper, But whoever confesses and forsakes them will have mercy.” (NKJV)
Guilt drains you of your ability to live in the present moment for God. Guilt follows you around like a dark cloud and threatens to rain on your parade. Guilt can sabotage our relationships due to experiences from the past. (This is friendship, family, children, spouse, work, etc…) But guilt keeps us so distracted by our past that we keep running off the road in our present.
Here is what I mean: Try to drive your car forward by always looking in the review mirror.
Sin creates major guilt in ones life. Sin keeps one looking out the review mirror of life until it is resolved God’s way.
The Bible says that we can become so accustom to the guilt in our lives that it no longer has any effect on us; that our “… conscience can be seared as with a hot iron,.” (1 Tim 4:2)
God wants your windshield to be bigger then your review mirror. You are built to live in the present moving forward not looking backward into the guilt of your past.
You look to your review mirror for perspective to see where God has brought you through or to help others but not to indulge in guilt, sorrow and remorse. You don’t look to the review mirror for guidance to see how to move forward.
When you swallow your guilt your body keeps score.
If you don’t talk it out with God and other’s you will take it out on yourself or others.
Confession is like an inoculation. It is like getting a small dose of the disease so you don’t have to get the full blown disease while it helps the person in need.
David said this in PS 32:1-5 “Blessed is he whose transgression is forgiven, Whose sin is covered. Blessed is the man to whom the LORD does not impute iniquity, And in whose spirit there is no deceit. When I kept silent, my bones grew old Through my groaning all the day long. For day and night Your hand was heavy upon me; My vitality was turned into the drought of summer. I acknowledged my sin to You, And my iniquity I have not hidden. I said, “I will confess my transgressions to the LORD,” And You forgave the iniquity of my sin.” (NKJV)
David prayed for God to search out every flaw so he could correct them. PS 139:23-24 “… Search me, O God, and know my heart; Try me, and know my anxieties; And see if there is any wicked way in me, And lead me in the way everlasting.” (NKJV) We must search ourselves to uncover our hidden sins and short comings. God will not heal you without your help. He will not violate our free will.
Some of us struggle with guilt from big-ticket problems like; fear, substance abuse, over-eating, sexual sin, resentment, gambling, or depression. Others of us struggle with guilt problems that sound so small, but hurt just as much. But we must remember to God a sin is a sin; there is no big or small.
When many people hear of other peoples problems; our thoughts might tend to go in one of two directions: “My sin isn’t so bad; I’m glad I’m not one of those people.” Or, “My sin is so bad I couldn’t possibly take it into the church and talk about it!” Remember to God a sin is a sin.
People are only as sick as their secrets. Let me say that again; People are only as sick as their secrets. God knows this and wants us to be well and whole. When we open our hearts and share with others the things that are on our hearts we start the healing process.
We read in (1 John 1:8-9) “If we claim to be without sin, we deceive ourselves and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.” (NIV)
John tells us the principle of confession and the purpose of our need to confess. This is not a silent confession as we see in James.
Sharing with others is what we read in (James 5:15-16) “And the prayer offered in faith will make the sick person well; the Lord will raise him up. If he has sinned, he will be forgiven. Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective.” (NIV)
Did you hear what James said? Prayer from you to God will make me well! Is that not awesome!! James went on to say to get this awesome gift that I must share with you my short comings (sins), character defects (sins) so that you can pray to God on my behalf so I might be healed. It is a three part process.
This is wonderful news. God’s principle of healing you or me requires three. It requires God, you and me. I can not do it alone by wishful thinking. I can not do it by moral living. I can not do it by having sound theological knowledge. I can not do it by having worldly riches or power. I can not do it by being popular. I can not do it by my beauty and good looks. I can not do it just between God and me. I must depend on you and God – both to be free. No longer can I hide.
Notice this passage does not say that all sin must be confessed before the assembly on Sunday morning. It says the one doing the praying is singular not plural. Is there anything wrong with confessing sin before the whole assembly? Not at all! However, discretion is encouraged when confessing socially grievous sin even within the fellowship of the church.
Confessing sin that would encourage others to overcome or would help others in their walk should be confessed publicly. Sin that affects the church should be confessed publicly. I do not think it is unwise to be careful with confession. Not even in 12 Step programs does someone share their past unwisely. They think long and hard about whom they will share it with. Some people gossip in every organization.
The Devil wants’ people to stay stuck in their secrets: Wants us to stay sick. Let me say it again; we are only as sick as their secrets.
I know this is easier to talk then to walk. I know first hand how hard it is and how humbling it is. I also know the blessings that are known from walking the path of confession and getting my faith wet.
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